mhm.

all our memories went out the door,
thinking about them makes my tears poor,
you traded your family for a whore,
i'm sorry we couldn't handle it anymore,
now from the pain; my heart's very sore,
i roll up and lay there on the floor,
and think back to the good days at the age of four.

as i sit there inside and watch it rain,
i do my best to hide my pain,
it's not my fault you went insane,
what you were like is hard to explain.

you and my mom had so much friction,
it's like lying and cheating became your new addiction,
and trust me that wasn't my prediction.

now i've moved on and i know how to stay alright,
i am not here to listen to you try to fight,
i'm a young girl; and i'm gonna finish my life fun,
as i watch all the clouds and rain turn into sun.

i won't let your mistakes hurt me,
that's something your gonna have to see,
i'll make it through every night,
trust me i'll be alright.

i don't need you and all your lies,
because each time it gives me more reason to despise,
i do not hate you; you are my father,
you try to bribe me, but i'll never forgive you; don't bother.

i'll find the sunshine through the rain,
nowadays, i have no pain.
i'm a new girl, it's the new me,
and try not to hurt her like you did the old one, please.

i have never in my life, met someone who hated a liar soo much, but was the biggest liar i knew..always talked about how if other ladies husband cheated on her she should divorce him in a split second..but when it came to him, my momma couldn't divorce him at all..i've never had this much anger to someone, that i thought i would have the MOST love towards..i'm the new me, i like the new me..i just need my mom, my sister, and friends..i will never ever be changed back, i'm a new page, in a new chapter, of a new book..and the other book has already been took out of the library for good. if it was easy to find the best in you, i would've already done it..you only show the worst, and i think that's your best..so i'd hate to see your REAL worst. it'll never be anyone's fault, except yours..never forget that..and when you look at the pictures of the old you, remember you messed that up, not me..

your mistake...

every time i look in the mirror and see my reflection,
i have to remember you made your decision.

and during the storms; i sit there and wonder,
how i don't have my father to hold me through thunder.

i was a daddy's girl with all of my heart,
i never ever thought we would be apart.

people say i'm sad; trust me i'm not,
because before the present,
i had to sit there while ya'll fought,
you treated my mom like some worthless, little, peasant.

you lied, you cheated, you broke all our hearts,
and now all our lives are falling apart.

it's really hard to hate your father,
but the old love i had for you is hard to bring back so,
why should i bother?

i have so much anger built up and i don't know what to do,
all i know is each day i find another reason to dislike you.

i'll be crying one moment; then laughing the next,
because with you i don't know what to expect.

first it's this; then it's that,
and my last time with you; you had a gun and a bat.

and i just want you, and everyone to see,
you made the mistake; not me.

whateverr.

to the father that made me and my family's life miserable;

i've said my whole life i get everything from you..my looks, my personality, my facial expressions..i sure as heck ain't getting your mistakes! you made some of the worst mistakes I've ever seen! I don't see what you see in a cocaine addicted hoe..is it her sunk in cheeks, her bad breath, rotten teeth, her rat's nest she calls her hair? what is it!?!?! all the memories we've made faded away in so little time..from a brand new, nice house..to the living room walls with holes you punched in them..they always say forgive in forget..well i ain't forgetting and i ain't freaking forgiving either! all your bribes won't make up for all the crap you've put me through. and if you'd like to trade making memories for getting busted for carrying that hoe's drugs then make your mistakes..i sure ain't caring..if you care about me dating so much...then why can you date who you want, even though you're married?!?!? do you want me to grow up thinking guys can cheat on me and hit me, and that's okay? when i grow up and have my own kids and they ask where their grandpa is i'm gonna say i don't know...he left me at the age 14 for a hoe..i think i'm gonna stop with this blog, let the laptop charge and do another in 30 minutes.

goodbye. [: